I initially planned to rewatch "The Wedding Plan," but opted for the suggestion Amazon offered, "Make Me a Match," a documentary about three singles and two shadchanim in Israel.
Technically, it's about an engaged "older" woman (34! Heavens!), an American aliyah-nik, and a divorcée.
I was really turned off by the scene when the divorcée meets with her shadchan (she possesses a well-known reputation, and also set her up with her ex), who crudely describes her best option: Pounce on a widower!
When shidduchim are rendered as such, as survival of the fittest, I want to puke. Is that how it works? Play the game, roll the dice, be there at the right time, and then you'll get a spouse.
Gross. I wouldn't want to marry like that.
Ortal, the spunky gal whose wedding is the opening scene, was told by a rabbi to daven for 40 days by the Kosel. She wasn't eager to do it—it was winter, parking sucks, but she davened wholeheartedly, asking Hashem for His salvation. Before the time was up a rabbi called with her shidduch.
I like that story a lot better than "stalk widowers." Shiver.
I don't know, davening is always good, but I'm not so keen on turning things into segulahs. Maybe it will take thirty-nine times or forty-one. We don't know how many times Yitzchak and Rivka davened, they just davened. Or maybe it's just not time.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a segulah-nik either. Nor do I believe there are guarantees with a 40x something done. I just prefer that advice to "chase down widowers."
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