Monday, April 30, 2018

How To Stay Sane While Dating: X

So, ladles (and jellyspoons), have you experienced at least one horrific date? I can empathize. 

The date that holds you hostage for hours on end. The date that insists on misunderstanding everything you say so you look stupid. The date that makes it my fault because he inflated his height on his information, insisting that he is 5'10", which would make me 6'5". 

You are desperate for this evening to be over. Why is he chewing so slowly? Where the hell is the waiter with the bill? Can this car go faster? Our Father in Heaven, please may there not be traffic! 

I felt defeated and drained following such dates. But I also felt, of all things, validated relief. 

What I always feared in dating is what if I go out with someone who is nice, but that's it? Does that mean that I'm required to continue dating him, since he's not Oscar the Grouch? If I say no, am I being picky, unreasonable, doomed to spinsterhood? 

The upside of terrible dates is that the answer is simple. You text or call the shadchan that thank you sooooo much for thinking of me, but it isn't shayach. Epic-ly not shayach. So not shayach that I wonder about this person's sanity. With no worries about my own. 

The inoffensively polite gentleman has given me a lot of grief. Please let him say no please let him say no please let him say no I would pray. Most times they did, but then there were the few times they didn't. The anguish I went through, feeling like scum for hurting such a nice boy—I would have taken a bad date any day. 

When you have arrived safely on your doorstep, furious at the shadchan, furious at the jerk you were subjected to, furious furious furious, remember: He is obviously not for you, so he's not the one. 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Go to google or YouTube and search for: "women hate nice guys".