Born This Way (Laughing Hysterically)

I know I'm pretty late to the game, but I started watching Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. While I personally can't stand stories about women who chase down uninterested men, the pilot episode hooked me with "The Sexy Getting Ready Song." 

Rebecca is getting ready for a party where she hopes to see the unrequited object of her affection. The opening scene is the usual, lady in lacy lingerie, strappy heels, and satin robe gyrating in front of a mirror.

Then it goes downhill. We bear witness to the true beauty process, which involves plucking nose whiskers, waxing body hair, scraping off dead foot skin, suffocating body shapers, eyelash curlers, and horrific burns from curling irons. A rapper enters, and begins the usual sexist lyrics, then trails off as he witnesses how the sausage truly gets made: 

"God, what... this is how you get ready? This is some... this is horrifying, like a scary movie or something. Like some nasty-*** patriarchal ****. You know what? I gotta go apologize to some b*****s. I'm forever changed after what I've just seen." 

At one point, Rebecca croons, "Let's see how the guys get ready," and the camera cuts to Rebecca's date, Greg, sleeping peacefully on the couch. 

As she wafts from the house looking smoking, Greg can't believe his eyes. "Oh, I just woke up from a nap," she says airily. 

The episode closes with the rapper, Nipsey Hussle, calling up a list of women and apologizing. 

"Hey Denise, it's me, Nipsey Hussle. I recently had an eye-opening experience. I'm calling to apologize for the way I treated you when you danced in my recent music video. Denise, I'm sorry I showered you with Cristal. I didn't even ask if you liked Champagne, and it probably messed with your blow-out." 

"Ashley, I realize now that it wasn't right for me to tell you what to do with that big fat ***. You can wiggle it, or you can sit it down in a classroom and get that college degree in communications." 

"Chelsea, I'm sorry I put you in a bikini made of gold coins and then made you dance on the roof of my Bentley. I realize now that metal conducts heat and that was probably a very uncomfortable experience." 

"Anyway, Denise, hit me up whenever you get this. I'd love to discuss The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir, which I just read. You are beautiful inside as well as out. You are my equal!"

I was weeping (with hilarity). It reminded me of this post, along with Amy Schumer's music video, "Girl You Don't Need Makeup" (the boy band serenade her that she's perfect without glop, only to recoil in disgust when they see the reality, and beg her to slap the stuff back on). 

My niece said to me the other Friday night (with a complete Shabbos Face), "You look pretty." 

"Thank you, sweetie. It only took a half hour." 

"It was more like forty-five minutes," she corrected.

Gentlemen: Respect the process. That is all we ask. (Han does. Good man.)

TGIF

• The Last of the Master Wig Makers.

Treat It, Don't Ignore It

So, um . . . I have dandruff. 

You couldn't hear me? *Cough* sorry. Well, er . . . I have dandruff. 

Nothing to be ashamed of, you say. But somehow I always thought it as an acceptable male malady, with their Head & Shoulders. When I started getting flakes in my 20s, I focused on alternative treatments that weren't specific to dandruff. 

Like weekly coconut oil hair masks. For my hair's sake, I would say, while working it in my scalp to moisturize. Yet whatever Google claimed, I still had a flakes.

I decided to grow up and face reality. I bought Jason Normalizing Treatment Shampoo, and just like that *snap*, the dandruff was gone.

I'm so happy with it I bought a second bottle. It is a worthy repurchase.  

Comfy Beauties

In my teenage youth, I loathed makeup. I found it false, and worse, an effort. 

Yet here I stand before the bathroom mirror, 90 minutes before a date or wedding, applying and dabbing and penciling with gleeful care. I feel fabulous. I love it. I no longer think of paint as "false," nor do I consider it work.

I also love my cleansers, creams, serums, oils, shampoos, conditioners, Dead Sea face masks . . . the list goes on.

Via theodysseyonline

Ta always claimed there was a Gemara or something that said fathers must provide their eligible daughters with cosmetics and skincare, so halachically, a little chein and yofi (also known as sheker and hevel in Eishes Chayil) is fine. 

Now there is a "No Makeup Movement." Alicia Keyes no longer wears any. True, but she has plenty of product to treat her skin and style her hair. Where is the line when it comes to "natural" beauty? 

 

Haley Mlotek considers this in "To Wear Makeup or Not to Wear Makeup?"  She claims, "The question is surprisingly fraught, but the answer is simple": 

. . . comfort is the root of confidence, and not the other way around. This is true whether a person is wearing makeup or not.

And (don't be surprised to hear this) I believe that to be true. If a gal walks into a room without "enhancement," she'll bowl everyone over with her ear-to-ear grin. She could be followed by an exquisitely crafted Face who refuses to make eye contact or smile, and people will nervously edge away from her. 

I'm comfortable in my Face. Other women aren't, so it won't give them that boost of attractive confidence that I experience. Thankfully, we are not all the same. 

Although, would you be willing to try a touch of mascara? It's a miracle-worker.  

"I Whip My Hair Back and Forth"

It's been a long time since I blow-dried my hair. I mean me, personally, actually doing the work. 

A few years back, it was part of my pre-Shabbos prep, like anything else. But it became burdensome and unfulfilling. After wrestling with sopping wet hair (no time so close to Shabbos to let it air-dry a bit) to the point of getting fashvitzed, the results on Shabbos day looked . . . well, disappointing for all that effort. 

Additionally, I became suspicious of heat-styling. My beloved hair, to be mercilessly torched, week after week? I began to shoin it. 

So, I packed away my blow-dryers and flat-irons, although every once in a while (like twice a year) I did use my Conair Infiniti Pro. For events, I had my hair "done" (at which time I also had it trimmed). 

For the sake of my hair's health, I enter into the Sabbath with damp locks, smoothed with a few drops of argan oil in half-hearted attempt to prevent frizz. And, as always, it looks great at around 3 p.m. Shabbos afternoon, long after my return from shul. 

So it was I was in a hotel bathroom Friday, with all the time in the world to prep. However, this Shabbos was an event, but I was not willing to have it done professionally with an unvetted stylist who would charge me who-knows-what.

I conditioned thoroughly in the shower (I mix John Frieda Go Blonder Conditioner with a deep conditioner, currently Giovanni 2Chic Avocado & Olive Oil Hair Mask) and let my hair leisurely air-dry for a couple of hours. 

Then, after dithering over which Sephora-issue sample to use, I applied Living Proof Prime Style Extender. Then tugged out from my suitcase The Brush. The Brush and I have been together for years. I bought once upon a time for blow-drying purposes and have felt no need to replace it. It's not around anymore, I don't think, but plenty of alternate versions abound.

I messily clamped one side into layers, and wielding the brush in one hand and the hotel blow-dryer in the other, began. 

It didn't take long. The results were great. And, despite a restless night, remained great. No dents at all. It also lasted for the next few days! 

Do you know what this means? I can "do" my own hair! Successfully enough! How freeing! 

Fave Oils

The oils are back, my peeps! Good fats are making a comeback, in the kitchen and the medicine cabinet. 

For the last few years argan oil has been my baby. I use it on my hair—I rub a few drops between the palms and run my hands through the strands. Instead of a bushy 'do, it behaves itself come Shabbos morning (my hair always looks great on Shabbos afternoon, never during Shacharis). The ends of the mane are so soft.

As the weather has cooled, I've been dabbing it onto my face after cleansing, before applying my other nightly creams. Nourished skin is young skin. I have to avoid the milia-prone areas, although argan oil is considered not to block pores (I had a bad experience with jojoba oil). 

When selecting oils, check the ingredients. Many can be cut with nastiness like mineral oil. Get 100% only. 

Next, coconut oil. I hate coconut, the taste of coconut. Bleh. I do not cook with it, but use it on my hair once a week for an intense mask. Previously, I used standard tubs of the stuff, which in winter would solidify and be a pain to extract and spread. 

Enter Carrington Farms Liquid Coconut Oil. It remains liquid, no matter the temp, making it easy to apply. I also don't have to use as much since it doesn't have the consistency of thick goop, and in turn, less shampoo to remove the grease. 

It's also great for applying to the body. Don't neglect that as chilly days threaten. Coconut oil supposedly reduces inflammation and redness. 

Dressing for Men: The Barber

Waiting for my turn in the salon chair, my eyes wandered over to the in-house master of hair as he snipped a teenage boy's hair with scissors. His technique was carefully observed by a new employee. 

When the kid thanked him for the great haircut, his barber went on a rant. The electric hair clipper is the most horrible invention, he stormed. All heads are created different, and to take a one-size-fits-all machine to hair is an absolute travesty. 

I wholeheartedly agree. 

My sister-in-law took my nephew to a so-called barber, then was frozen in shock as electric clippers tore through his mane in record time. He looked like trailer trash. His hair rebounded, but I'm certainly still traumatized. 

Dudes: Find thyself a barber, and not one formerly from the army. Your hair should be cut with scissors, not with a machine.  

The Repurchased! III

Okay, ladies, summer is almost upon us (yes, I said "almost"), which means I stock up on heat-sensitive products (such as SPF) now, before they can get cooked in shipping. 

SPF!

• For a number of years running, my go-to is Elta MD Clear SPF 46. I hated every other SPF until I was introduced to this one. In the summer, my combination skin needs no incentive to over-grease, and this one protects without oils. 'Tis the Amazon best-seller in SPF.

• Lip skin is thinner and just as susceptible to sun damage, if not more. Alba Botanica's Very Emollient line is beloved by many. I've been religiously using the Suncreen Lipcare SPF 25 and keep on returning to it. 

• Another constant in my cabinet is the Alba Botanica Very Emollient SPF 45 Pure Lavender. It's easy to apply, and it keeps mosquitoes away (in my experience), better than official "bug begone" sunscreens.  

 

Moving on to other beloveds: 

• For cleansing, an idle T.J. Maxx purchase has become my holy grail: Giovanni D:tox System Purifying Facial Cleaner. It contains charcoal, which pulls out impurities. And I mean it pulls them out; I can see gook rising from my pores (I know, I know, TMI). Yet, it doesn't strip my skin. In the interests of being open I tried another face wash, and missed the Giovanni terribly until I finally used up the other one (waste not). 

There is also an accompanying Facial Scrub with fine exfoliating bits that I like. I use it after cleansing once or twice a week.

• Desert Essence has a coconut line, and the three that I've tried rock: the Coconut Shampoo, the Coconut Conditioner, and the Coconut Hand Wash. 

The shampoo cleanses without destroying; the conditioner goes deep without oiliness; and the hand wash lathers up and moisturizes my skin at the same time.

• For the last few summers, no matter the many other nail colors in my basket, I end up applying OPI Dutch Tulips, either alone or with a different color coat beneath. It's a divine mingling of red, pink, and orange.

• While I was initially wowed by the Beauty Blender, and do still love how it performs, it became dotted with black spots of mold despite my careful cleaning and air-drying. 

I tried the Real Techniques Miracle Complexion Sponge instead, for even if it becomes moldy at some point, at least it's priced for swifter turnover.   

  

Ladies, any recommendations? 

Scribble Away the Pain

I'm a bit slow on the uptake. It was not until recently (very, very recently) that I finally labeled myself with the lofty title, "Writer." Especially since the follow-up question is "Where have you been published?" Online blogging (obviously) does not count. 

I used to only write—and fiercely enjoy it—for school. In my dim-wittedness I did not know that I could do it, you know, for myself, maybe one day professionally. Once out of college and devoid of required papers, my writing ceased. 

This blog was originally established to be about the fetishes of the stereotypical Hungarian—fashion, skincare, makeup, really scrumptious recipes. But there is only so much one can post about face cream ("Elta MD is still my favorite SPF for summer!"). As I began to write, I also branched out in my reading, which in turn broadened my mind. My education has not ceased after leaving academia. 

I also feel pretty good. Is it that when writing, one can purge oneself of negative emotions? Tara Parker-Pope reports ("Writing Your Way to Happiness") that studies show that writing definitely helps: 

The concept is based on the idea that we all have a personal narrative that shapes our view of the world and ourselves. But sometimes our inner voice doesn’t get it completely right. Some researchers believe that by writing and then editing our own stories, we can change our perceptions of ourselves and identify obstacles that stand in the way of better health.

The mind can replay upsetting situations in a hopeless light. By writing it down, seeing the situation outside of one's brain, can awaken self-awareness, changing the perspective, finding solutions. 

“These writing interventions can really nudge people from a self-defeating way of thinking into a more optimistic cycle that reinforces itself,” said Timothy D. Wilson . . .

Dr. Wilson, whose book “Redirect: Changing the Stories We Live By,” was released in paperback this month, believes that while writing doesn’t solve every problem, it can definitely help people cope. “Writing forces people to reconstrue whatever is troubling them and find new meaning in it,” he said.

. . . “The idea here is getting people to come to terms with who they are, where they want to go,” said Dr. Pennebaker. “I think of expressive writing as a life course correction.”

The health benefits are quite surprising, even extending to the romantic realm. In "The Best Way to Get Over a Breakup," Anna North writes about how writing exercises assisted the heartbroken. 

When one is in a relationship, "me" morphs into "we." When the other half leaves, one could have forgotten who one is. Writing about it can reclaim the lost sense of self. The sensation of loneliness lessened.

But one can journal about problems too much, ruminating almost as much as thinking about it. Write it out, find some revelations, get to comprehend motives and emotions, but don't wallow.   

For many, the key may turn out to be some self-reflection, but not too much: writing about your feelings, “but then not necessarily mulling over it or doing any more. Just write it, talk about it, leave it, do it again.”

“There’s a really delicate balance between avoiding and getting over-involved for every stressful event,” Dr. Sbarra explained, “and so you touch on it, you think about it, you put it out there, you reflect, and then you sort of create some distance.”

Cleansing Conditioners

Ah, hair. The bane of the single frum girl. 

An issue I have with my mane is that on Shabbos day, after being washed squeaky-clean the afternoon prior, it would be prone to frizz by the sides of my ears, which is probably the dorkiest place for frizz to appear. I feel like Ben-Gurion. 

By the next day, the natural oils would have soothed the area, thereby leaving it perfect on Sunday, which is no bloody help. 

I shampoo only twice a week, but no matter how I tried to cut back on the Friday shampoo, even with my gentle, moisturizing option, followed by tactical conditioning, the fuzz was still there Shabbos day. 

One day, I found a list of "exotic" cosmetic items that are supposedly surprisingly in Target. One of which was Renpure Solutions Cleansing Conditioner. 

Cleansing conditioners are the new hair care products on the block. Shampoo strip and dry, especially if used daily; I constantly tell my niece, who lives in the shower, not to shampoo her thick, frizzy mane every day. She listens to me (I think) and sticks to conditioner alone. But this could be a better option.

 

The method is to apply 10 to 12 pumps (some may need more than that) and massage it all over the head for 2 to 3 minutes, then leave it in for another 3 to 5. 

When I first worked it into my scalp, it felt incredibly soothing. My scalp is prone to dryness and dandruff. I'm guessing shampooing wasn't helping.

I used it one week solo, but found the ends of my hair needed additional conditioning. But no ear-frizz the next day! The following Friday, I applied additional conditioner to the ends of my hair and did my usual apple cider vinegar rinse as well. Lovely.

Current Friday hair system: 

• Cleansing conditioner;

• Condition ends with something heavy-duty; 

• ACV rinse; 

• Gently squeeze out excess water; 

• Wrap in a microfiber towel or turban (cotton towels are hard on wet hair);

• In my case, combing my hair when wet removes any chance of drying in pretty waves. I only blow out my bangs. The rest of my hair air-dries.
  
• If my ends still require my conditioning, I rub a few drops of argan oil between my palms and run it through my hair.
  
• Another trick I have discovered is to twist my hair into a messy bun; this manages to tame the hair from puffy into smooth. A Shabbos friendly-move, too. 

Once I ceased heat styling my hair has responded with the cheerful healthiness. It feels softer, and I have less split ends. I get it blown sporadically, only in the case of an occasion and it would make my life easier if the strands were beaten into submission.

In the interests of full-disclosure, my hair still doesn't behave if there is any humidity in the air. There was some Ben-Gurion tufts this past week. But it's is certainly improved from before. 

There are now many options to cleansing conditioners; here's Allure's list, Huffington Post's picks, and Amazon has many highly rated options. I've got As I Am Coconut Cowash Cleansing Conditioner for my next option.

Not won over?  No-Shampoo is, like, soooo in. However, as the article notes, it is a matter of balance, and hair type. Co-washing (as cleansing conditioner is also referred to) may not always remove all the residue (that's where my vinegar rinse comes in handy). Plus, you have to work it in, even though it doesn't lather, as one would shampoo.    

Via beaityglimpse.com

Another option: It's not about all or nothing. Shampoo only once a week, while co-washing the rest of the time. (I still shampoo to wash out my weekly coconut oil hair mask. It's very necessary.)

If one regularly shampoos and then switches to co-washing, there may be an initial over-production of grease, since that is what the scalp was churning out to compensate for the shampoo's oil stripping. But in a few weeks, the head will acclimate to this less rigorous way of life.

Queenly Bedding

I only sleep on silk. 

Wait, that came out wrong.

Silk pillowcases claim to make frizzy hair less so, to take it easy on the skin, and to maintain soothing coolness when a bed becomes overheated. According to some, they don't collect dust mites, which is a perk in the case of my perpetual rhinoritis.

I am still not sure about the belief that it provides all sorts of skincare benefits (there doesn't seem to be much data to back that up), but I was intrigued . . .   

Then, a cousin told me (Bobovers know everything) that she had heard that a satin pillowcase would be very understanding of Shabbos Face. 

So of course I ordered one the next morning. 

When I first discovered it on Amazon, it was only available in white. Now they come in a motley of colors that will match to any themed bedding.

 

Well, it is certainly addictive. After all, silky smoothness feels veeeeery nice. As for benefits to keeping on Shabbos Face? I'll have to say it is extremely helpful, but still try to keep one's head at an angle, and use a stiffer pillow so the Face doesn't sink in too deep.

A visiting nephew also tried to casually pinch it for his own use. It really makes a pillow very cuddly.   

Tangles Tackled

"Sit still," I admonish her. She whines and wiggles and emits yelps of pain as I haul my brush repeatedly, heartlessly, through her full mane. 

I finally manage to wrestle it into a semblance of control, twisting the now gleaming yet thick halo into a zaftigeh braid. "Ooooow," she still moans, reaching for her scalp. 

"Don't touch it!" I snap, whacking her hand away before she can mess up my hard work. "Your fault, anyway; you have been obviously not using all those conditioners I bought you. Standard? Deep treatment? Leave-in?" 

She smiles a tad guiltily, and ceases her noisy self-pity. 

That is something along the lines of my hair-dressing interactions with my nieces, but it is simply history repeating itself. As a child, after getting dressed in my offensive polyester uniform, I meekly sat at my mother's vanity and had my hair brushed, ponytailed, braided, and ribboned. 

 

"People talk to you differently when your hair is made," she would say to me, and now, to her granddaughters. "Especially morahs. So stop kvetching; bring me the brush." They sullenly trot off to fetch it.

For those out there with little girls whose hair needs to be manipulated, and there are accompanying waterworks, there is a new tool at hand. 

The New York Times mentioned the Tangle Teezer, a supposedly miraculous brush with malleable bristles that gently eases its way through knotty strands and coaxes them away, as opposed to standard brushes that rip them out of existence. 

When I checked it out on Amazon, I was informed that there are already other options, like The Wet Brush and SHARKK, which have handles that can be gripped. I got The Wet Brush. (I later purchased the SHARKK as well, and the two seem to be equatable).  

The premise is that it calmly detangles gnarly hair, when it is especially so when wet. But I make a point not to brush my hair when wet, since hair is weaker then and more prone to breakage. But no worries, it works divinely on dry hair as well. 

It also claims to be good on wigs—takes the tangle out, not the hair.

When my thick, wavy hair has dried, this brush gently tugs it into civility, without a squeak from me. I experimented it on my niece who had just gotten out of the pool—apparently she screeches bloody murder every night when her hair is brushed out of the bath—and she boomed, "This is my favorite brush!" 

Needless to say, I have purchased these for all the little lasses.  

Apple Cider Vinegar: Not Just for Salads

I had come across the concept of using an apple cider vinegar (ACV) solution as conditioner, so I decided to give it a try with the bottle of Heinz already in my kitchen.

Since my current method of hair cleansing is shampooing only the roots then conditioning only the ends, the roots of my hair needed a little more consideration. But applying any conditioner up there would lead to greasy hair in no time. 

ACV conditions without residue, plus it is beneficial to the scalp, treating issues like dandruff and oiliness. Something to do with balancing pH. 

Current procedure: 

1) Shampoo roots, rinse; 

2) Condition ends, rinse; 

3) Pour an ACV solution all over, rinse. 

The results? 

Despite my deep conditioning treatments, including a weekly coconut oil hair mask, when I rinse the ends of my hair (where most of the damage happens) with ACV, the ends are distinctly softer than with conditioning alone. (I have tried using the ACV without conditioning but the results weren't as nice as when using both.) 

Additionally, my hair, usually thick and heavy, feels lighter. According to one theory, the ACV removes residue that can weigh down hair. Because it supposedly "seals" the hair, I believe I am getting less split ends. 

There are differing opinions as to water to ACV ratios; some say 1 tablespoon in a cup of water, others 1 part to 1 part. I just eyeball it, pouring it into a squeeze bottle. Obviously, avoid getting it into eyes. 

I don't apply any additional product afterwards, and my hair now dries beautifully on its own, or if I style with my trusty Infiniti Pro by Conair Spin Air Rotating Styler, the waves stay even after being slept on for more than one night, when previously the additional oils in my hair would refuse to hold the look.

As for skin, it has been hailed as an acne cure, banisher of scars, etc, etc. When my bottle of toner was used up, I reused the container to make for myself some ACV toner, which is working out quite well. 

Via www.luluandsweetpea.com

This article on Huffington Post by Kirsten Hudson provides more info; many beauty blogs are singing ACV's praises. It is recommended to purchase organic, so that item is ready and waiting in my shopping cart. 

And before you ask, no, the stink does not stay. 

Next challenge: Baking Soda Shampoo! 

Middle Part Must Go

I hate middle parts. The hair that hides the face, instead of framing it; the starkness of the line bisecting the scalp; how in order for it to look good, one needs to seriously pay a stylist. 

Even then . . .

Nope.

If men look dorky with it, why shouldn't women?

When the part is off to one side it's so much more flattering. That way, the face is displayed to its best advantage, while on the other all that hair can do its chic thang. 

Now, isn't that better?

And it looks good on guys, too. 

Get yourself a rat tail comb to make a defined side part.

Boy, Am I Thick

Has anyone else had that moment when ceasing a certain standard practice suddenly opens the gates of promise?

I have just recently discovered that I can really stave off hair oiliness by using a nourishing shampoo (I like Desert Essence Coconut Shampoo and J.R. Liggett's Old-Fashioned Bar Shampoo), then NOT condition the roots AT ALL, only the ends of the hair. 

It makes a ridiculous difference in keeping my hair light and shining, for much longer. Since I shampoo only twice a week, my hair just doesn't get oily. Oh, hoist by my own deep treatment! 

Then quite by accident I discovered that if I don't comb after toweling my hair, then not blow-dry it at all: beach hair results.

After fifteen years I find this out!?!    

Dressing for Men: Hair Grease

Also known as Vaseline hair. 

Why, men? Why?

There are quite a few fellas out there that think that by plastering large quantities of product in their hair, they look "cool." What I see is a .22 away from "mob enforcer." 

How does one maintain all that product? Every night must require hefty shampooing, lest the grease destroy a favorite pillow. 

And what about the yarmulka? What does it look like after being parked atop greased locks a whole day? Do these men have a drawerful for daily use and disposal, like contact lenses? 

If anyone's hair—male or female—looks wet or oily by way of product, that is not a good thing. One is just advertising to the world that they have problem hair, as only the strongest and bravest of gels will tame it. 

Don't grow hair long with the intention of slicking it back, men; just get a haircut. If any product is needed to tame frizz, please, please, everything in moderation. Use a small amount that is absorbed into the hair so I don't have to see my reflection in your shiny mane. 

Put a Wig on It

If wigs become accepted by the world at large, have they lost their religious exclusivity? 

It seems that the convenience of a wig, donning a perfect hairstyle every day after paying a hairdresser only once, is a perk that we Ashkenazi frummies cannot hoard to ourselves, so sayeth the NY Times. 

Christine Young, not a frummie, but who likes her wigs.

Even women with perfectly functional natural hair are choosing to wear wigs since they are such time-savers, and offer many looks.

Frummie reliance on the wig has provided employment for those who never even knew what an observant Jew was, as in the case of Atsuko Tanaka, Japanese sheitelmacher galore. 

Yes, that's a frum client in the chair.

Hadiiya Barbel has actually renamed wigs as "crowns." She's got a lot of frum clients too, amongst her celebrity clientele.

  

We are on the path to typicality.

Furry Face

The beard is not a look I am familiar with. 

My grandfather was clean-shaven even in the old country, sporting only a manicured mustache. The other Zeidy's visage was shaved free of any stubble at all. Ta has always been clean-shaven; my brothers by blood and by marriage are all quite attached to their Norelcos, although they do grow rather charming goatees during the times of year when facial hair is left untouched. 

But the beard is becoming popular in the secular world, as seen in Jimmy Kimmel's "Hipster or Hassidic" bit.

So, for the Jewish male who likes his whiskers, there are now many products to avail of, as observed in the NY Times. If one's facial hair needs moisturizing to reduce itch and become softer and more manageable, for instance, there is beard oil. 

If concerned that product will be emasculating, just remember that is why one has a discreet medicine cabinet to store "non-manly" items.       

Oily Hair is Happy Hair

In the humid summertime, I iron my hair for Shabbos to ensure no frizz (maybe just less frizz). 

Usually, by Sunday, my hair looks great—enough oils have redistributed, making my locks shine with health and manageability. However, right after ironing . . . not so much. Even with leave-in conditioner and anti-frizz serum, the ends of my hair are somewhat stiff and crispy. 

Sephora once gave me sample sizes of Josie Maran's Argan Oil. In the pursuit of experimentation, I dribbled a drop or two onto my palms, rubbed them together, then ran my hands through my hair, which thirstily drank up the offered nourishment. 

With literally the amount of a raindrop, my hair now had that shampoo-ad smoothness and "flip"-ability; instead of waiting for Sunday for my hair to look good, it looked great right off the bat.

There are many argan oil-based products for hair and body, as well as the 100% oil itself, available on Vitacost.

In the Science Section (of all places) there was a query as to why some hair types frizz in the humidity. The answer was that hair that is dry sucks up moisture from the air, which eventually leads to frizz. Meaning, the more moisturized hair is, the less it will frizz.

I've recently become aware (thank you, StepItUp) that many hair products have alcohol as the primary ingredient, which actually dries hair out instead of moisturizing it. That's why this 100% oil seems like a good bet.  

To Cut Blowing Time

When I style my hair, it is usually required for the hair to be somewhat or completely dry first. I try to give myself enough time to air-dry on Fridays to keep heat damage at a minimum, but I end up needing to speed up the process by blow-drying.

Over the years I managed to accumulate more than one hair dryer; Costco manages to make so many unnecessary items appealing. One day I had a "Eureka!" moment. 

I took a spare surge protector and plugged it into my bathroom outlet. I parted my hair in half, then hooked up two hair dryers. With them both on the cool setting, I let 'em rip.

Keep in mind I use no finesse here; I just aimed both nozzles at my head.

It's amazing how much time was then shaved off my hair styling. Well within 15 minutes, sopping wet hair was relatively dry, ready to be ironed or put in rollers. 

Beforehand, if I used one dryer on a cool setting, it took forever for my hair to dry. Now my hair is ready for further punishment faster, without further crippling heat.