Thursday, September 17, 2020

Honey Peeves

I've become a cantankerous broad (my age is showing). With all this talk of "apple and honey," I've become a tad pedantic. 

Because, when we speak of "dvash" in the biblical sense, it is technically date honey, not bee honey. So if we were going for authenticity, everyone would be reaching for a jar of silan. 

And what's the mishagaas about the apple? There's nothing significant about the apple itself. Everyone's making apple cakes and whatnot. But the apple doesn't represent anything! Maybe because one can't really going around dipping any other fruit into honey without it getting uber-messy?

I'm a little sore on this topic because I've never liked honey. Never. I just don't like the flavor. And if you say you don't like honey the first week of first grade then everyone looks at you like you've gone to the Dark Side. 

Because Rosh HaShana is all about the honey! 

Well, we're all grown-ups now, right? We know that if someone doesn't eat honey on Rosh HaShana she will not be doomed to a horrific year. Especially since it's about the sweetness, dating back to times when sweetness tended to be expensive. Honey was the available sweetener before cane sugar became a thing. 

I really like maple syrup and agave. I just don't like honey. Plus, now that I'm old and crabby, it also disagrees with my stomach. 

Han actually told me last week that he doesn't like honey either. I don't think I've ever been more in love. 

I'm not throwing out the baby with the bathwater. I'm still going to slice up an apple, but dip it into the sweetness of my preference. I've got the round challahs made. There'll be carrots and squash in some form, why not? There'll be a new fruit, probably the boring yet non-scary one Ma would get, the apple pear.

But no honey cake. There will be cake, but it won't have any honey in there. No fish head (Han hates fish, and I'm still carrying childhood trauma from seeing the fish head tucked next to the gefilte fish in the same container). 

Minhagim and simanim are important. But not if they make yuntif stressful. The ikkur is the yuntif, not the symbolistic trappings.

Everyone else knows how to shower others with New Year blessings, and I lamely reply, "Right back at ya." But to all, a git gebensht yur.