I disagree with this: 'I believe that what people are really saying when they say, “You’re so picky” is this: “It sounds like you know what you want. I don’t know anyone like that. Why not just settle for the guy or girl down the block that I know? S/he is nice and normal.”'
I think what people are really saying is what she said next, which is to make sure you know what you really want, or more importantly, to have realistic expectations. That's what people mean to say when calling someone too picky. Now yes, most people aren't asking for the guy making millions, going for 2 doctorates and learning 6 hours a day. But there are those who are.
As for being picky, Surfing the Shidduch Scene linked to this article today: http://www.vosizneias.com/150203/2013/12/23/new-york-oped-what-i-did-with-my-shidduch-list/ (Couldn't html link it- guessing you block that?) on Vos iz Neias. What do you think of it?
My response to the shidduch list story is going up tomorrow.
I get told I'm being picky when I haven't said anything. Just by the fact that I am single means that I'm picky. It's hurtful to hear, and usual unhelpful. For those who are actually being persnickety, they are not just picky, they are delusional. They probably are about other things too.
Right, it's definitely the furthest thing from an "everyone above the age of x is guilty of it," but it's hard to deny that being picky exists as more of a torrential downpour than a drizzle.
4 comments:
I disagree with this: 'I believe that what people are really saying when they say, “You’re so picky” is this: “It sounds like you know what you want. I don’t know anyone like that. Why not just settle for the guy or girl down the block that I know? S/he is nice and normal.”'
I think what people are really saying is what she said next, which is to make sure you know what you really want, or more importantly, to have realistic expectations. That's what people mean to say when calling someone too picky. Now yes, most people aren't asking for the guy making millions, going for 2 doctorates and learning 6 hours a day. But there are those who are.
As for being picky, Surfing the Shidduch Scene linked to this article today: http://www.vosizneias.com/150203/2013/12/23/new-york-oped-what-i-did-with-my-shidduch-list/ (Couldn't html link it- guessing you block that?) on Vos iz Neias. What do you think of it?
(oops, forgot to subscribe to comments- that's the purpose of this comment)
My response to the shidduch list story is going up tomorrow.
I get told I'm being picky when I haven't said anything. Just by the fact that I am single means that I'm picky. It's hurtful to hear, and usual unhelpful. For those who are actually being persnickety, they are not just picky, they are delusional. They probably are about other things too.
Looking forward to reading it.
Right, it's definitely the furthest thing from an "everyone above the age of x is guilty of it," but it's hard to deny that being picky exists as more of a torrential downpour than a drizzle.
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