Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Support Group

My nephews and nieces are now old enough to realize that something is not right. Something is missing. They look at their friends' older siblings, ask my age, and are puzzled. "Lea," they ask, "when are you getting married?"

It is particularly hard on the children who have rarely been to weddings, who want to not only be a part, but a center of them. I remember how it was  by my sister's wedding—I'm important, I'm the sister, this is my party. I don't mind if they feel the same way. That's what kids think at 10.
 
On the evening of my bad date, I sprang out of the car, pleading I had to go in to help my folks with the einiklach who were staying over. He drove off, triumphant, not expecting the inevitable "No" from the shachan, and I felt terrible.

I staggered into the house, where three pairs of young eyes  greeted me at the door, looking expectant. I collapsed, faux-sobbing, on the 8-year-old's neck.

"It's okay," she soothed, stroking my back. "You don't have to see him again."

Bless you, child. Despite her burning desire for wedding festivities, where she can sit up front by the badekin and chuppah, where she can have made-up hair and wear a billowing dress, she will put my needs first, trusting my judgment. 
http://image.made-in-china.com/2f0j00NMotcDkfCyqQ/Flower-Girl-Dress-With-Sleeves-Davids-Girl-027-.jpg
Her sister thinks I'm being unreasonable, however. "Was he really so bad?" she wheedles.  

"Just pick one," the brother chimes in.

Don't be surprised if I have a favorite, kid.

3 comments:

Ish Yehudi said...

I have the MOST to teach the ones that think they're cooler than me :P

Maybe we should swap advice on tactics sometime... gender issues notwithstanding.

Sefardi Gal said...

It's cute that you have this little support group.

I haven't really dated anybody who thinks he's cool when, in reality, he's a huge loser. But I have, unfortunately, dated nebuchs who decide to tell me all of their problems. For some reason, a lot of my dates open up to me about their issues, fears, etc.
I basically consider myself an uncertified therapist now.

PL said...

I don't claim to be "cool." It's just horrible to be stuck with those who think they can fool you otherwise.

Ah, yes, the unpaid psychologist. I know that manifestation well.