Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Honeymoon At Home

Romantic comedies have this premise from time to time; an older couple, embittered by day-to-day tediousness, have "lost their way," and one of the two (usually the wife) plans an amazing getaway where their love is rekindled, presumably forever. 

In Carrie Seim's article, "The Hail-Mary-Moon," real-life data does not bear conclusive success. While it works for some, it does not work for others. The uptick of such excursions reflect the current financial climate, where divorce can be obviously more expensive than pricey attempts to reaffirm a relationship. 
While they have supposedly assisted others, it can also be a means to effectively destroy the bond completely. 
Hail-Mary-moons can have downsides, of course. David M. Frost, a psychologist and assistant professor at Columbia University who studies long-term romantic relationships, warns that these trips are often quixotic and can easily backfire. “It’s highly unlikely that a vacation can be a magic cure-all — it might only be a temporary Band-Aid,” he said. Even worse, he added, the forced closeness might cause relationships to suffocate and implode.  
Today's generation seems to believe that throwing money at a problem fixes everything. Don't get me wrong; I like money as much as the next person. Maybe even more, because I know how to spend it (I kid. Sort of). But I am firm in my belief that it does not provide lasting happiness. 

My great-grandmother never left her hometown, in all probability. Maybe she made an excursion or two to a nearby city. She did not have Caribbean beaches or Northern Lights as an inspiration. 

What did she have? Discipline. 

In so many aspects of life, I have found the connecting thread is discipline. People make the mistake of giving in to personal whims in order to achieve happiness; but it is only through discipline that true happiness can be attained. 

Even though I am a terrible traveler, whenever I have dragged myself on such trips I am usually breathless with appreciation. I am grateful for the opportunity to climb atop "the wings of eagles" and experience that was impossible not so long ago. There is most definitely magic in distant vistas. 

But such sorcery is not permanent. Because it is impossible that money and distance from real life can be a lasting solution. 

Take the "The Honeymooners"; despite the inference of the title, the comedic couple rarely left the confines of their very small home. But "baby" was "still the greatest." 

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