Friday, August 29, 2014

Battle of the Bulge: We Can All Dream

After watching myself for a few days, I can't stop rhapsodizing to myself during davening one morning. 

Goodness, I feel great! Light, airy, like gravity couldn't keep me down! Why would I ever overeat when I feel so fantastic? It's so simple! It makes absolutely no sense for me to stuff my face in that mindless way. This is first day of the rest of my life, I shall always be in the grips of iron self control, because I want to hold on to this ecstatic sensation always! 

Then the kinfauna come to visit.

"Eat up the rest of your supper." 

"But I'm fuuuuuull." 

"Two more bites." 

Two grudging bites. 

I can't throw away good food, even though I had supper already.
Next day: 

"Can I have some cake?" 

"After you eat lunch." 

She eats lunch. 

"Now can I have cake?" 

"Sure. A piece for you . . . while I stand here by the open Tupperware and mindlessly munch."

You get the gist.

Davening the next morning: 

I don't understand. It made no sense. I still over-ate! Why? Incomprehensible! Well, today is the first day of the rest of my life!

I can gently roll off that wagon. It doesn't take that much effort to. But clamber back on again, as soon as may be. It'll take a little more koyach, but just keep forging onward.

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