Friday, January 4, 2013

Short End of the Stick

As is quite obvious, I likee my sci-fi. Futuristic sci-fi movies has mankind soaring through space, accelerating the healing process, converting matter into food. 

But one thing remains the same: women give birth while shrieking in agony.

Seriously? We have epidurals now; according to sci-fi writers, in a couple hundred years, women will give birth in floating hospitals by a hologram doctor and she will still be in agonizing pain?



1) J.J. Abrams re-do of Star Trek. Great movie. Alternate time-line bit—brilliant. Got Leonard Nemoy, perfect. 

Yet, while the ship's computer can tell if a crew member was killed on the Romulan ship because his vitals blipped, James. T. Kirk's mother is sobbing and gasping as she gives birth the old fashioned way. It's the frickin' FUTURE, people! The alien doctor should be able to casually inject something that either safely postpones the birth until back on Earth or James enters this world without ripping his mother to shreds.

2) Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith. The prequels should never have been done. My proof being, Amidala's twins are being delivered by ROBOTS! And the same weeping and screeching as though she's a peasant woman in the Middle Ages! C'mon! (Never mind how Amidala simply dies because "her heart is broken." At least have her killed by a blaster. Or by the Sith, at the edge of a lightsaber. But to casually die since she doesn't feel like living? [blows raspberry]).
Luke's hand gets SLICED OFF and he simply gets a new one. Giving birth should be a cakewalk.

3) Star Trek: The Next Generation, episode Disaster. Keiko O'Brien gives birth with the rudimentary cursing, sweating, and bellowing. Worf, her unwilling midwife, is armed with enough medical paraphernalia to bring down a horse. But no, she has her baby the boringly painful way.
She deserved better.
When will the nerds who wrote this stuff give women a break? Is it because the popular cheerleader in high school laughed when you asked her out? That's why all women must suffer, unable to earn cool ends but rather through the most typical thing of all, as babymakers?

Let us act out our death the noble way, with a blaster in hand. 


tesyaa said...

I never thought of that, but wow. OTOH, we already have planned c-sections and painkillers for the aftereffects. (Not that I recommend that course, but some people claim they like it).

Maya Resnikoff said...

Women on these shows also go into labor with a tremendous lack of warning- and all of a sudden, they're ready to push. I think that birth is so primal an image that no one thinks to present it as something safe, easy and clean. I think that people who make TV expect that it wouldn't communicate without the screaming. But it is kind of absurd, and I had never even noticed it, on my own.

tesyaa said...

Well, birth may be safe in today's day and age, easy in some cases, but it is rarely (if ever) clean.

FrumGeek said...

I'd like to point out that Star Wars happend a long time ago, and perhaps science didn't take the same path it took in our galaxy. Heck, regular guns don't seem to exist. And moreover, perhaps there was some sort of religious reason for queen natali portman not to have an epadural?

Mighty Garnel Ironheart said...

Okay, let's be fair:
Kirk's mother gave birth in an emergency situation as she is being evacuated from her ship as it blow up around her. Epidural? She's lucky she's alive.
Portman have birth while on the run from Palpatine's thugs, already half dead from a broken heart and a Sith throat choke. Again, epidural was probably not her priority.
And Keiko? She was a traditional woman. Her mother hollered during childbirth. Her grandmother hollered during childbirth. She's gonna holler through childbirth.
And Worf? Why would pain relief be a priority to a Klingon?

Princess Lea said...

Tesyaa: Pretty much every sitcom has the same premise.

Woman says she wants natural childbirth.

Then she actually goes into labor.

"Where's the drugs!?!"

MR: That's why all those mothers smirk when the tv misrepresents it.

FG: Because blasters are on a higher level than guns, obviously! If Luke can get a new hand no problem . . .

MGI: Oh, how I laughed.

But Keiko wasn't that traditional; she married an Irishman rather than Japanese, right?

FrumGeek said...

But Luke got a new hand many years later. Remember what Ani's fake hand looked like and why are we discussing the awful new trilogy again?

And just a side note, with her last child, my mom decided to have a natural childbirth despite having an epadural for all her other children. Then she started yelling for it when it was too late lol! (She said if she were ever giving birth again, she'd definitely use an epidural.)

Mighty Garnel Ironheart said...

> But Keiko wasn't that traditional;

Sure she is. She kept her traditional name and I think O'Brien spent more time eating sushi than drinking Guiness.

Besides, tradition doesn't help when there aren't any boys from your ethnic group around.

Princess Lea said...

Oh, she was on a rather roomy space ship. I'm sure there were plenty of nice Japanese boys hanging around.

As I recall, didn't O'Brien get sick of all that sushi and hanker for a piece of steak?