Friday, January 18, 2013

The World is My Runway

My inspiration for this idea comes from, oddly enough, Yitta Halberstam. She made it very obvious to me how one carries oneself can make all the difference. (She didn't realize her point while she was making it, but I am firm in my belief one can learn something from everyone.)

My conclusion from her article was that it is not the looks that we are born with that hold us back, it is how we present ourselves to the world. If someone is crippled self-consciously, even if she had been blessed with the best genetics can offer, she will then be less charming, less personable, less attractive. 

If someone doesn't feel that inner verve, then one has to adopt it externally. 

"Why are you so calm?!" a friend snaps. 

"I'm not calm; not by a long shot. My nerves are frayed inside. I just pretend to be calm." 

Like at times when I'm in the car with a dangerously driving date or, better yet, my Hatzolah member brother-in-law; my innards may be clenched to pieces but I smile serenely, unwilling to let him push my buttons, even when he steers with his knees. 

Confidence is less about actuality and more about how one acts. I make a conscious decision to walk with my back straight, my head held high, no matter what thoughts are going through my head. That affectation of security does wonders.   

I have become mistrustful of those who are insistent as to their qualities. "I'm confident," she says. "I don't care what other people think," he says. But from the way they behave, they aren't as confident as they would like to believe they are. 

Never mind about saying it. Just fake it, and walk that runway like you own it. Even if you are just getting some milk.
Don't plod. Don't slouch. Don't frown. 

Chin up. Eyes strong. Smile

And down that runway you go. 


Mighty Garnel Ironheart said...

Actually, the Shulchan Aruch says you're supposed to walk quietly and humbly without an outstretch neck and raised eyes.
Just saying....

Anonymous said...

MGI- If that's the case, then what about 'Hevei mekabel es kol haadam b'sever panim yafos?" How can you do that if you're looking down? -Aliza

Anonymous said...

The Beckster said...

Great post. Totally agree. It's all about how you carry yourself. The world is full of lots of people who want to bring you down. Let that get in your way? Nev-ah! Walk tall ladies. Walk tall. (P.S. I'm actually working on a similar post now...stay tuned ;)

Nechama said...

How'd you get so lucky to get so many spam comments?

Princess Lea said...

Thanks, Aliza! I knew there had to be counter-quote but I was always bad with chazals.

TPV: Please stop posting things about the "shidduch crisis." They just get me angry. Very, very, angry. And it is not pretty when Princess Leia gets angry, is it?

Beck: Looking forward!

Nechama: Go be nice and have no security phrases . . . I don't want to, but I may be forced to.